*Taking a deep...an extremely deep breath*
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Go!
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I know people are just being concerned. Thanks really but at least try to understand my situation. It sounds simple, it sounds like it is the right thing to do at this point of time taking into consideration my age and the environment I'm living in. Yes yes, most of my friends have gone through it and the same goes to one of my cuzzies. Owh well, another one in January 2011.
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It's not that I'm not being sensitive or cautious about the whole thing but like I said, try to be in my shoes for a second. The topic I'm talking about right now is no monkey business. It is not some sort of entertainment that people can just simply ask me to do. It is sacret, it is pure, it is about achieving a purpose in your life. You cant just simply throw yourself into it as if it is for amusement.
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Like previously mentioned in my earlier entry, I have witnessed a fall. It is not about being afraid to commit or feeling so negatively about the entire idea. It is about finding the right time and the right moment. Now, for me it is no longer about finding the right someone. Someone to be called the oher half as I have already found him. Now, it is all about getting to know one another more, to understand each other's needs, sensitivities and all that..why? Cz you will be spending the rest of your life with him or her. Embarking on a different journey once you have put your soul into it. Like I said, it is no monkey business.
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I want to be ready. Fully prepared. I dont want to merely step into this different world because I was asked to. I need to be ready. Dont get me wrong. Trust me, though I may look masculine/guy-ish/a bit gay from outside, I am actually very feminine/girlish/a bit kinky inside. To be with someone I love is all I can ask for. I just need time.
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The end
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